Lauren Sandbach
WMST 2010
K. McCauliff
7 March 2008
Four Generations of Feminism
When I began the Women’s Studies course at the University of Georgia, I felt like I had a fairly good grasp on feminism and its role in history. As a history major, I know all about the Seneca Falls convention. I had to memorize Margaret Sanger’s name and her affiliation with birth control for several exams, and I even wrote my essay for the 2006 AP American History exam on women’s role in history. Besides feeling fairly informed on the issue of women’s rights, I also felt I understood my family’s viewpoint and role in the feminist movement. However, after studying feminism for a few short months, I realize I was completely wrong. My mother and I are fairly close, and I would discuss different class topics with her immediately after class. Our conversations typically ran as such:
“We talked about abortion today in class. I thought I knew exactly how I felt about abortion, but now I’m totally confused and I really don’t know where I stand.”
“Well Lauren, you know where I stand with abortion, right?”
“Of course Mom, you’re against abortion. You’ve told me probably a million times that you would never get an abortion and you don’t agree with it. You always tell me how you don’t know how a woman could live with herself if she did this. You are pro-life.”
“Actually, that’s wrong. I am against abortion, but I’m pro-choice. I’m totally against the government telling a woman what she can do with her body.”
I was entirely shocked at this answer. My mother has always been my best friend who knows me better than anyone in the world. I thought I knew everything about her, but I completely misunderstood where she stands on an issue as important as abortion. This led me to reconsider my other assumptions on my family and our history, which is why I chose my grandmother to interview. Much to my surprise, after the interview with my grandmother, I discovered a feminist trend inherited by each generation in my family.
When I ask both my mother and my grandmother if they identify with feminism, they claim not to be feminists. My grandmother, Francis Doty Crawford, at age 72, claims “I used to be turned off by feminism. You see women in the news who are so down on everyone else and I’m sure the females have done well by this because we have gotten better pay in jobs. I am not one of these people- I’m calmer. I try to make peace rather than cause friction. However, I do feel like women are entitled to equality.” I am automatically skeptical of her denial. Even in her explanation, she shows characteristics of feminism. Not only does she support higher pay for women in the workforce, she feels they should be treated equally to men. While this may not characterize radical feminism, it is far from an anti-feminist attitude. Francis claims the viewpoint that women are equal to men, which is at the heart of the feminist movement. First wavers such as Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Lucretia Mott claim “That women is man’s equal—was intended to be so by the Creator and the highest good of the race demands that she should be as such.” (Seneca Falls resolutions)
Without even realizing it, my grandmother reinforces not only her feminist identity, but also the feministic qualities of the past three generations of women in my family. She begins describing my great-grandmother’s independent, self-sufficient lifestyle. In her generation, women were not expected to go to college. However, my great grandmother had such an intense love for children and a need to be independent, she went behind her father’s back to receive a teaching degree. When she returned home, her father realized how important teaching must be to her, so he built her a school and allowed her to teach. Francis notes that he always felt embarrassed because people thought she was forced to work because he couldn’t support his family. Women in her generation did not work unless it was out of necessity. The feminist movement was far from where it is today. However, that did not prevent my great-grandmother from pursuing exactly the lifestyle she wanted. However, her life was not without hardship. Besides criticism for working as a schoolteacher and obtaining an education, my great-grandmother lost her husband to leukemia and had to raise three children on her own. Although she did not choose to be without a husband, she somehow found a way to put her three children through college. My grandmother describes how her father was a Kentucky farmer, and the government took his land away during WWII. Her mother used this money to fund college for her three children.
My great-grandmother had a major influence on the woman my grandmother is today. Francis tells me that her mother repeatedly told her “you never know what tomorrow will bring. You have to be prepared to support yourself. I’ll put you through college but after that, you’re on your own.” Her words greatly influenced my grandmother’s decisions in life. Not only did she go to college to support herself, but throughout her life she never had an expectation to depend on men or other people to take care of her. She married my grandfather, but the marriage quickly turned detrimental. He was an abusive alcoholic at the time. My grandmother says, “When I came along divorce was a bad word. Many people wouldn’t let their children play with your mother because I was divorced and many women thought I would steal their husbands away. I was raised that you did not divorce but when it came to the choice of my child or divorce I chose my child and put her first. I couldn’t handle seeing my child suffer for a choice I had made.” I recognize her situation as a double bind: she knew she and her daughter would have consequences in society if she left her husband; however, if she conceded to society, she and her daughter would remain in an abusive situation. As Marylin Frye states, she was in a situation “which options are educed to a very few and all of them expose one penalty, censure or deprivation.” (Frye 2.) I believe my great-grandmother directly impacted her decision, because Francis states, “ I was very aware of my mother’s independence. My husband resented my mother for her independence, but I admired her for it. I knew that if she could raise three children on her on, then I could do it. This was the final push in my divorce.” Without such a strong, admirable role model, I wonder if my grandmother would have been able to leave her unstable situation and if I would even be here today.
My grandmother’s divorce certainly impacted the way she raised my mother. She says the most important advice she gave my mother was to get through college. “Your mother always had good insights,” she claims, “and I knew she would be fine. Everything is hard work; you have to work at everything. I knew that if she got through college then she would be just fine.” Just like her mother before her, my grandmother always expected my mother to receive an education and support herself. In contrast to her mother and grandmother, my mother has a traditional lifestyle. She has been married for twenty years, and she works part time. However, her choices do not prevent her from instilling the same independence and motivation for an education in me.
Francis’s history also influences her present views of feminism. Her opinions strongly characterize third wave. Even though she does not claim to be a feminist, most of her views reflect feminism. After having to support herself and making her own decisions for an extended period of time, my grandmother has a true appreciation for women’s choice. She states, “I think it should be a choice [to join the workforce]. Women should have the choice to do whatever they want to do without feeling held back by other people.” Her views result from the tough decision she made to divorce her alcoholic husband. Although other people did not accept her decision, she made a choice and did what she felt was necessary for herself and her child. As a true third wave feminist, she believes that women should not be left without an option; they should always have the right to choose.
My great-grandmother’s single parent lifestyle directly influenced my grandmother and my mother, which in turn affected me. If my great-grandmother had not been such a strong, admirable figure in my Francis’s life, she never could have left her hazardous situation for a happier, safer life. Both women exhibit outstanding examples of feminism through their bravery, strength and independence. Their lives reflect examples of true feminism in times where women rarely objected to the lifestyles planned for them. These women passed their character on to my mother, which I strive to exhibit in my life as well.
“Seneca Falls Resolutions.” The Seneca Falls Women’s Rights Convention. 1848
Frye, Marilyn. “Oppression”. The Politics of Reality. p. 2. 1983
No comments:
Post a Comment